Posted in fantasy, Kifo Island Chroincles, Sea Changes (KIC #!), Weekly Features, WIPpet Wednesday, Writing Sample

“Especially Not to Me”: Sea Changes (Kifo Island Chronicles Volume 1) for WIPpet Wednesday

Welcome to WIPpet Wednesday, a weekly blog hop which encourages writers to move WIPs (works-in-progress) to publication by posting excerpts related to the date.We’re led by the capable fingers and nimble mind of Emily Witt.

So, do you remember what you were doing twenty-four years ago, today?

I do.

I was laying on the couch at my parents’ house, unable to lift my hands even to chest height, because of the pain in my neck. That’s where I heard that Paul Simon and Edie Brickell had just welcomed a son into the world.

Maybe I should back up a few hours…

I was driving to a mandatory training session for work along Interstate 787, which goes from a limited-access highway to a 45 mph stretch bisecting Cohoes, New York. People often speed through this area, even though there are major local intersections governed by traffic lights.

It was expected to storm later that afternoon, so I was focused on getting to the meeting, then seeing my last client of the day, in the hopes of making it home ahead of the weather.

One of the lights turned yellow far enough ahead of me that I was sure I wouldn’t be able to beat it safely. I had plenty of time to slow down and stop. I was waiting when I heard and felt a tremendous impact which sent my little subcompact through the intersection – fortunately, there was no traffic moving in that direction right then – and to the other side, my foot still on the break.

Twenty-four years, and I still deal with twinges and stiffness from the several compressed cervical vertebrae. I’m lucky, though – the seat belt that confined the personal damage to my head and neck saved my life. It could have been much, much worse, as my totaled car proved.

So, in remembrance of that day, this week I give you a single, impactful paragraph. And, yes, I know I’m late – that can happen when you spend many hours reading Really Good FanFiction!

I’d like to say I have regrets about that, but I have none. =D

We’re back to Ava Garcia  in Sea Changes

Ava grew on me during the writing of her story. She was a constant revelation. Her struggle is compelling. For me, it goes beyond the issue of whether people should be allowed to choose the manner of their death. She encapsulates my personal attitudes about how children deserve to be treated. It’s an honor to share her voice with you!

The Premise:

In advocating for a dying girl seeking emancipation from controlling parents, can an overburdened young woman and a lonely young man find a future together?

Note:

This passage has been rough-edited (trust me, you don’t want to see the muddled-beyond-hope original version! My plan is to begin creating a more structured revision plan once the 24 scenes pass through my local crit group (which isn’t happening, at the moment. Post NaNo, I expect to pick up steam for the next few months.)

Your input is gratefully accepted, and might go a long way toward making this a better novel!

Context:

Donovan is helping Ava in the aftermath of a nosebleed, and her computer just signaled an incoming call, and he offered to answer for her.

WIPpet Math:

  • Today is December 28, 2016

  • I‘m sharing 1 paragraph.

Especially Not to Me”

If I know them – and I’ve had a lifetime of practice – they’d just start calling the authorities with stories. They’ll take some out of context. Exaggerate. Make things up, if that’s what it takes.” She sighed. “They don’t like to lose. Not to each other. And especially, not to me. Ever.”

 

Who’s calling?

Is Ava right?

Will she answer?

What’s next?

Next week, we’ll learn a little more…

Want more WIPpets? Click the button below, and even add your own date-related excerpt if you’re so inclined!

Author:

I am myself. I own my life, and live with three other people who own theirs. My intention is to do only those things that bring me joy, and to give myself wholly to those things I do. Writing has been my passion throughout my life, and this will become the home for my writing life...because it brings me great joy!

4 thoughts on ““Especially Not to Me”: Sea Changes (Kifo Island Chronicles Volume 1) for WIPpet Wednesday

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