Posted in A Round of Words in 80 Days, Challenges and Contests, Life Writing, Round Three 2015, ROW80 2015

Moving Along, Reflectively…: July 15, 2015

ROWing across the still waters…

Round Three is all about reflection, for me: where I am, who I am,

where I’d like to be, and who I’d like to be when I get there…

We’re now into the period I call Elijah’s Days – the twelve days that encompass the life span of our second child. There’s something about these days, for me – particularly the ten that fall between his birthday and the anniversary of his death on July 25th – that seems ripe for reflection, connection, reassessment…

It’s not straightforward. Sometimes, it’s far deeper than language. It’s the shifting that comes with living, and with being reminded that living doesn’t go on forever, for any of us – and that I want to make the most of it, while I’m here.

I’m going to give my attention to the things that most matter to me – joy, connection, expression…

Do you ever have times like this?

Storefront reflections, Schuylerville, NY, last week. Photo by Shan Jeniah Burton.

Color-coding key:

  • Goal attained = blue with overstrike.

  • Goal in progress = green.

  • Goal-in-waiting = red.

Writing:

Editing:

  • “Slow Jazz Awakening”: Highlight detailed notes for plot, dialogue, setting, character, devices, themes, general impressions, and things for later stories in this or other arcs. Nothing new.

Social Media:

  • ROW80: Submit sponsor post; keep visits up-to-date. My sponsor post is in; visits current.
  • Blog Maintenance: Keep regular posting schedule, comments, and visits. Continue on-time posting; up the ante a bit on commenting and visiting. Not doing so well here; Monday was an especially out-of-sync day, between Elijah’s birthday, several hours at the movie theatre during my Prime Writing Time, and various other Life Stuff. I hope to have a better assessment by Sunday.
  • Share posts – mine, and others’: Share generously and variously as inspired! Get out of my comfort zone a bit with this one, and explore some new ideas… Nothing happening…not even crickets. By Sunday…
  • Go on at least one social media adventure each week. I’ve been treating this like a chore – time to have fun with it! Nothing yet, but I have something planned.

Hometending:

  • Continue decluttering/beautification projects; in home and/or yard, five days weekly. I’ve got a flow now; ride the waves, and continue making improvements to our home and our quality of life. 1/5; Hometending. Another thing that got pushed aside for Life Stuff, but will figure in the rest of the week.
  • Create General Categories List of Things to Attend to Before We Move to Oregon; add specific items as/if they occur to me. Given a bit of thought; no action yet.
  • Homeschool Administration: Submit Annalise’s test results to school district when received; rough draft IHIPs for 2015-2016 (research requirements for Grade 9), create Jeremiah’s Peer Review Panel Form. Test scores are back; nothing else done here.

Lifetending:

  • NNWM local group: Attend write-ins regularly, and check in on the Facebook and Twitter groups as inspired. Complete one critique. Yes on write-ins, and peeking at the groupcritiques? Not yet.
  • Complete the two beta reads I’ve had waaay too long. Nothing new.
  • Meditation: Practice four times a week. Experiment with two new techniques. 3/4 for this week, including while bleeding brake lines with a stressed spouse on a hot day, so I could stay calm. Continued reading about mandala meditation; 1 /2 new techniques.
  • Starfleet: Fill out application and check on summer USS Albany group meeting schedule. Nothing new.
  • My beloveds: One on one time with each, doing something of value to us both, several times each week. Walks with daughter; chats with both kids; chats; couples’ time; and bleeding brakes with my Accomplice. We also all went to the drive-in movies for a double feature- Minions and Inside Out. It was the kids’ first drive-in experience and loads of fun!

Selftending:

  • Make time for physical activity every day; use phone app to track three time a week. 3/7 days, 1/3 with phone; Walking, weeding, and hometending.
  • Practice: Attend t’ai chi regularly; begin consistent at-home practice. Aim to add second class weekly. No class yet this week; perhaps tomorrow. Taken out by car stuff that is – at last! – resolved, for the moment.

These goals are a part of Kait Nolan’s ROW80 Writing Challenge  –

It’s also a blog hop – Find more ROWers!

Let this be your portal
Sometimes reflections are distorted…Photo by Shan Jeniah Burton.

 

Author:

I am myself. I own my life, and live with three other people who own theirs. My intention is to do only those things that bring me joy, and to give myself wholly to those things I do. Writing has been my passion throughout my life, and this will become the home for my writing life...because it brings me great joy!

8 thoughts on “Moving Along, Reflectively…: July 15, 2015

  1. Yes, I have times like that. It used to be the day/week in the Spring that my mom died that I would go to pieces and not be good for anyone. Now that has become a time of reflection. You said it better, but I do relate to that.

    1. I grieve with you for your mother’s death. That going-to-pieces feeling is so hard to live with.

      Elijah’s death is bracketed by my daughter’s and my own, which makes it …interesting, to say the least. maybe, when she’s grown, it won’t be quite so jarring, but, right now, it’s still a tricky proposition to go from one to the other to the next…

      It’s comforting to know that others are also learning how to deal with these times in their lives. ❤

      1. For me it’s been awhile. Funny though, grieving can take longer than you bet on. But I remember when I realized that I was having more ‘healthy’ thoughts during that time than desperate ones.

        Thank you for your lovely thoughts. I wish you didn’t have to go through it, and I am inspired by how much you share your thoughts about it with others.

        1. Elijah would be twelve now. I don’t think the grief and sorrow will ever go away. They have and do shift, over time, but the loss is a loss, and there are times when I feel i very keenly.

          I wish Elijah’s life hadn’t been so filled with trauma, invasive medical intervention, seizures, and coma. I wish I’d been able to nurse him, even once, or had the chance to hear his voice…

          But I don’t regret that his heart valves could give another child a life with far less invasive medical intervention needed. I don’t regret that he lived.

          Sharing about Elijah is, in part, a way to acknowledge the 26,000 families each year who will lose a baby under the age of one year.

          But it’s also a way to remember Elijah, to honor him, and to remind myself to live while I’m here, to seek joy, and, in doing those things, to give more meaning to his life….and his death.

          1. I thought my life was over when I had miscarriages. I can’t imagine how it was for you. That’s inspiring that you believe in organ donation and talking about it encourages others to do so

          2. It was life. One of the hardest parts of life I’ve ever had to face, but, while we were living those first days, and his life, I was struck by how lucky we were to have had the chance to hold him, even with tubes and monitors and a sobering amount of medical equipment (he was on a ventilator for the first half of his life). We had the chance to see his face, smell him, touch him…

            When we knew that he would likely die, and would never be well, we had the chance to begin to grieve for him, and to make choices about where we would go from that point…

            All those things, as hard as they were, were blessings, in that they are things I can hold to now. That girl, whom we don’t know, but is the age of our oldest…I often wish her well, and hope she’s living a passionate and joy-filled life.

            I grieve with you for your lost little ones. Miscarriages can be devastating.

            Much love ❤

  2. Really powerful stuff here, Shan Jeniah. It’s hard being reminded how fragile and precious life is. I’m sending lots of positive energy your way.

    Good progress on your goals as well. This round is off to a good start for you.

    1. It is hard, but it’s also something of a treasure. Knowing has changed my life, and that of my family.

      And Elijah’s death helped to give another child a better life. There’s something amazing in that, that his twelve days could have that much impact…

      Thank you, Denise. Positive energy gratefully accepted, and turned toward sharing with the world…

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